November is a hard month. The signs of winter shrouding the sky with clouds of heaviness, the naked trees lacking fullness and signs of life, and the brevity of daylight remind me that we will soon bring another year to close. Where did it go? What did I accomplish? Was it meaningful?
The heaviness of this month is accompanied by our anniversary. I know it should be a reason to celebrate, but again I question whether or not this year's journey glorified God and made and impact for his kingdom. Quantifying such a measurement can be daunting. Man's measurement and God's are completely different.
Measuring worth and eternal impact plagues me in the month of November. I know the Bible warns us not to do this. In Isaiah 55:8-9 The Lord tells us:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. 9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
We've packed up and headed east. In making this job transfer we've left behind palm trees, beautiful beaches, the hustle and bustle of Orange County and countless friends. It's hard. My heart aches to be close to the rushing waves. I've lived close to the Pacific for the last 25+ years. I didn't realize how much I'd miss it or how claustrophobic I'd feel without it.
It was 1986. Southern Illinois across the river from St. Louis. I packed up my royal blue '73 VW Super Beetle and followed my mom in her Dodge Caravan and my dad in his red '64 Volvo 544.
This looks exactly like my dad's car
Here's my bug...and my friends from high school. Not sure what they're doing. I think they're breakdancing.
We were packed and heading west.
Truth be told, I'm a west coast girlie. Born in Washington, raised mostly between Washington and California, but I spent three years in small-town mid-America where I graduated from high school and attended my first year of college.
In those three years, I became a mid-west girl. I loved it SO MUCH! I had amazing friends. I had acclimated to the heat and humidity along with the miserable deathly cold winters. I planned on growing old in Southern Illinois, sitting around the table with my midwest girlies talking about small town life, and having my kids know about corn fields and lightning bugs, but my plans were abruptly changed.
In the summer of 1986 my dad received orders (military Colonel) to head west. I was going back to the familiarity of the Pacific Northwest, but my heart wanted to stay in the midwest.
Much to my despair and objection, we packed up and headed west across the U.S.
My heart was being ripped out. I think it somehow broke. The grief set in.
I loved the life in the midwest.
Following our departure, sadly, I entered the worst years of my life. I won't go into how bad they were. Just know....They sucked!
Then in 1988, life began improving. I transferred to a great college, met the love of my life, and the rest is history, or so they say.
Fast forward 20+ years.
We're living the BEST LIFE ever! To be honest, I think we live in paradise. The last three years have gone by in a blink and they have brought me countless moments of joy. Life in the O.C. has been completely dreamy.
Never in a million years did I think we'd ever live anywhere but the west coast. I find comfort knowing the ocean is close. I love seeing the water. The sunshine and moderate climate are appealing. I consider myself a coastal girl.
But wait...
Transfer???
To where???
The Midwest???
Illinois??
Again???
I have long since let go of the midwest girl I once was.
I'm trying to wrap my head and heart around this one.
I'm trying to remind myself I have precious friends in the Land of Lincoln. There are adventures to be had, opportunities to embrace!
But really, it's just my heart that is breaking.
The other night we went to a movie with some friends of my oldest son and one of the dads.
At the end of the movie, the friend's dad, a scruffy teddy-bear-of-a-guy and former undercover police officer hugged me and said, "Come back to California. Come back to California."
I'd really like to.
Three years ago, when I moved back to California after years away, I got off the plane, took a deep breath, and thought, "I'm back!" It felt good. I feel like this is a land I belong in.
I hope there is good in store for us although right now it's tough to think of life somewhere else.
I'd really like to back peddle and somehow find a way to stay in Orange County.
Nothing's coming.
Pray for us as we enter this new chapter in our lives.
Prayer for our kids and my hub would be appreciated. I grew up doing this...it's tough stuff. Moving, finding a home, friends, church, school opportunities, sports programs, etc. It can be overwhelming and we're feeling it now.
Today is my birthday. It's my half-way mark to 90 and my half-way mark to 50. It's also Memorial Day.
As a kid I hated that my birthday always fell on or around Memorial Day. Friends left on weekend get-aways, camping trips or picnics making birthday parties difficult to plan. I grew up thinking it was a pretty sad and lonely time to have a birthday.
Remember Job? We're having a Job kind of week. If you're not familiar with this book named after a faithful man of God, Protestantism Suite 101 describes it as,
Teaching. Last week two of my teaching commitments came to a close. As I was packing up my class supplies I began to reflect upon the year. I get so sentimental, so easily. I realized this year how much I love teaching, not just teaching my kids, but others. I really do love it! Perhaps this is why I'm so passionate about homeschooling. I love learning and presenting material in a way that hopefully appeals to students.
Reaching the end of yet another year has given me cause to reflect on my brief experience in the public school arena. The first kids I taught are now in their 30's!! How can that be! I wonder what became of them? What happened to those little 4th graders? Also, when I look at the precious gifts given to me by dear Ukranian students and their families, I wonder if they made it in their new found country, America. What happened to Yuri, Alexei, Nazar, Ludmila, and so many more? Did they embrace the freedom they were seeking? Did the kids who struggled in 4th grade, make it through and find a love for learning? I often wonder where they are now. Teachers spend a year with kids, pour into them, and then the kids have to move on. Next grade, next teacher, next year.
Little Nazar, Travis, Olga, Travis, Antonio...1992
"Simplicity in your lifestyle will ensure you a happy life."
That was the fortune I found in a cookie last week. I'm not really one to believe in fortunes stashed inside the fortune cookie, unless they're verses I place inside homemade fortune cookies, but this one did spark interest as we continue to try to simplify by shedding the extra "stuff" accumulated.
I think I could be in the process of a heart change, maybe a growth spurt, or maybe like The Grinch, my heart is growing more love and compassion.
After reading Francis Chan's book Crazy Love last year, I was impressed to do something in service to the homeless. In that previous blog entry I shared my feeling about the homeless and about specific homeless folk in our area.
We've been faithful handing out baggies and backpacks (We have an abundance of drawstring backpacks we've been using too. They work great!) filled with goodies when we come in contact with the homeless. The kids really love it. They're always disappointed if we see a homeless person and don't have a baggie. I hear, "Mom, we need to get another baggie in the car."
Yes we do.
This year Francis Chan spoke twice at our church. One service was a pre-Easter worship service and the other was on Easter morning.
A couple days ago, after running errands, I sat at a red light on a routinely traveled road, making a mental list of the many things I still needed to do in preparation for a get-together at our house. In addition, to this mental planning, I'm sure my brain was also cataloging "to do" lists for the coming weeks and months.
Throughout your busy day, are your thoughts constantly wrestling with the multitude of philosophical questions plaguing society? I grapple consistently with so many topics bouncing around my overactive brain. Perhaps, my obsessive tendencies cause me to return to these questions, or perhaps I just want to know the answers. The world gives us one answer to life's questions, but God gives us a much different answer. His Word tells us:
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9
Facebook has brought friendships that I never dreamed I'd have. I have found common interests with so many unexpected people.
One Facebook friend whom I've never met in person is a gal who attended the same church we did in Washington. I know her kids through AWANA back in the days when I was a leader. She's an amazing woman and momma to 5 kids, most adopted. She's also a single mom. She's home schooled. I admire her in so many ways!
Good communication is imperative in successful friendships, marriages and parent-child relationships.
But, even with the best intentions and willingness to listen sometimes what is begin said isn't what is heard.
I can't even tell you how many times my hub will say something, but what I hear is completely different from what he intended.
Effective communicating and listening can be really difficult. One perfect example occurred yesterday with our oldest son, The Teenager. NOTE: What I heard and what was being said were two completely different things.
We were at Target. We had just walked in front of the video/electronics section heading toward the toy section so our Lego son could look for Lego figures.
As we passed the electronics section, our oldest son blurted out in a loud voice, "ARE WE BROKE?"
I was a little shocked he would ask that right in the middle of the store, especially since it came out of the blue. It's true there have been some financial struggles lately with a number of unexpected expenses coming up, but we're by no means broke. Why would he ask such a thing?
I told him to be quiet.
Then he said it again, "ARE WE BROKE?"
UGH! Why does he keep repeating it? People at Target do not need to hear this.
Then he said it again, "ARE WE BROKE?"
I gave him the, "Do not repeat that again!" look.
He then gave me the, "Mom, what's your problem?" look.
I said, "Do not say that! There is not a problem. We're fine! Now stop it!"
He looked at me quizzically.
Then there was silence and we headed to the toy section.
After about another minute or two, he kind of whispered, "Mom, are we broke?"
Why won't he let that one go?
I then looked at him and said, "Honey, we're not broke. We're fine."
He then sighed and said, "No mom, Our Wii broke."
Oh...our Wii broke.
Whew!
He wasn't trying to frustrate me. We just didn't understand each other.
He kept saying, "Our Wii broke," but I was hearing, "Are we broke?"
My poor son!
How many times do we hear one thing, while our kids (or spouses) are saying something completely different.
As parents we need to really pay attention to our kids (and spouses), ask for clarification if necessary and make sure we are understanding each other before jumping to conclusions.
Listen to your kids (and spouses). What they're saying may not be what you're hearing at all.
A new year brings new beginnings and fresh starts. Each January my hub and I sit down and compile a list of goals. Every year I hope to be thinner, fitter, smarter, and wiser. I strive to be a better wife and mom. I hope for big accomplishments and attain a few.
But the reality is every year I have just about the same body I had the year before. I'm just about as fit as I was the year before. I've read a few more books, seen a few more museums and checked a couple more items of the bucket list of life.
Ultimately, my life goal is to be a Proverbs 31 woman. At the end, I hope it can be said, as in Miss Rumphius, (with God's help and guidance) I've done my part to make the world a little more beautiful.
This year rather than taking the same approach to goal setting, I'm going to proceed a bit differently and go back to basics. Thinking about the new year and setting goals, I was impressed to consider Exodus and the 10 Commandments. A fresh look at these well known Commandments offers guidelines to everyday living in 2012. After each commandment, I'll insert my own personal application.
1) YOU SHALL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE ME
No other gods before the One True Holy God.
My resolution: Do not bow to the god of materialism, the god of security, the god of comfort, the god of gluttony/food, the god of obsessive behavior, the god of money, the god of health and fitness, the god of busyness, the god of perfectionism, or any other god that would take first place in my life over GOD. I shall be loyal to God.
2) YOU SHALL NOT MAKE ANY GRAVEN IMAGE
Worship shall be directed to God alone.
My resolution: Continuing to develop, know and worship God will be a daily part of life. I will continue to share God's love with our kids.
3) YOU SHALL NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD YOUR GOD IN VAIN
Speaking God's name shall be done in respect and with honor.
My resolution: When I speak of God, I will honor His goodness and blessings He's placed in our life. One of my favorite sayings will still ring true, "God is Good All the Time!"
4) REMEMBER THE SABBATH DAY AND KEEP IT HOLY
Honoring God by slowing down and resting.
My resolution: This is a hard one for me. Taking time to slow down feels like wasting precious hours. It will be hard to take time to slow down, rest and allow time for God to speak, restore, and rejuvenate, but as a commandment, I realize it must be important. I will rest. When I don't, please remind me of #4! Seeking accountability here!
5) HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER
God has blessed me with great parents, grandparents and in-laws.
My resolution: I will respect and honor my parents, grandparents and in-laws. They were placed in my life by God. I will cherish family history and strive to learn more about our forefathers who were so instrumental in making us who we are today. It is a goal to begin an ancestry study this year.
6) YOU SHALL NOT MURDER
Have reverence for life and respect those around you.
My resolution: I will continue to support organizations who work to support and honor life. I will continue to support organizations like Childcare Worldwide that seek to save the lives of children around the globe. I will be open and consider opportunities God places in our lives in which we can support those who are seeking new beginnings. I want to encourage those around us to succeed. I want to be a dream encourager not a dream killer.
7) YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY
Marriage is sacred. I don't know if there has been a year in all our married life that we've seen more marriages of Christian couples blow up. It's heartbreaking! My hub and I have discussed this and it saddens us. When we married we made a covenant commitment before God until death do us part.
My resolution: We will stay married. I know that sounds strange, but with so many marriages falling apart I think it should be announced we will commit to make this marriage work with a Christ-centered focus, and open communication. We will do this because it's a commandment, and also because we have a history, three beautiful children and there's nothing in this world worth blowing it up.
8) YOU SHALL NOT STEAL
I will not take what doesn't belong to me. I will work diligently.
My resolution: If I didn't work for it, and it wasn't a gift; it's not mine. I think this also applies to time. There are certain hours in the day that are designated to our kids schooling. I will not take their hours for my own.
9) YOU SHALL NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS AGAINST YOUR NEIGHBOR
Be truthful. Reserve judgement until all the facts are known. No gossiping.
My resolution: My words shall be used to build up others and not tear down or wound. Be a source of encouragement.
10) YOU SHALL NOT COVET YOUR NEIGHBOR'S POSSESSIONS
Do not be jealous about what someone else has or what they've earned.
My resolution: It is my desire to be content. This is hard when we live in the land of the O.C. or better known as the OH WOW!
Although I see many around us with more and better, my heart shall be content with what we have.
Although I see those around me lifting more weight and doing more pull-ups, I shall be content.
When I see a gal with beautifully manicured eyebrows or a wonderful Brazilian blowout, I will be content with my home blown hair and self-tweezed brows.
When I see cute, thin yoga-momma in her Lululemon's, I will be grateful for my curvy figure- I hear curves are making a comeback.
I will appreciate and compliment others on the blessings they receive and I will refrain for wishing for more. Contentment. It's a good thing!
And lastly...
Love this year as I've never loved before.
As commanded in Luke 10:27
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself.”
Even though I'd like to think I know myself pretty well, it's amazing how God continues to reveal aspects of inner thinking continually. Just when I think I have most things figured out...I realize I don't. One area I've realized He may be working on is the ability to receive graciously.
A few night's ago, as I was driving home from a friend's house, I was thinking on this last year and the generosity of family and friends. I was overcome with overwhelming gratitude, but also a sense of overwhelming indebtedness! Tears streamed down my face as I thought on recent gifts we've received. Christmas may have brought on more emotions than normal, but I realized although I'm so grateful for the gifts, I also have a hard time receiving them.
I spent the last few days since the tearful drive trying to unpack the reservations I have with receiving. Why is it so hard? Why do I feel indebtedness along with gratitude?
Here's some of what I came up with:
1) Receiving is difficult when I feel I didn't earn it. I have a strong work ethic and value earning what is received. If I didn't work for it, I have a hard time accepting it.
2) I love giving. If you're familiar with the 5 Love Languages, giving is one of the ways I show love to others. I love pouring out on others, but having others pour out on me is difficult. I honestly feel bad for those giving. Maybe there's a sense I don't feel worth the gift. There are a number of stories of times I'm sure my parents could share of loser boyfriends taking advantage of an extravagantly giving girlfriend. I think I've tried to justify this over the years, but deep down I think I internalized, I wasn't worth giving to.
3) Keeping it even. Like most people and family members I tend to keep it even. By keeping the giving even, no one feels left out. I spend $25, you spend $25. Even! This type of giving allows all recipients to leave on balanced terms. But, when I give a $25 gift yet receive a $100 gift, I feel awkward, and unbalanced. The $25 gift, although nice, pales in light of the $100 gift. When this happens to me I feel like a loser, baby! Now, if I gave the $100 gift and received the $25 gift, no problem. This practice is okay in my world.
4) Payback. When receiving an extravagant gift I feel like I need to write up an I.O.U. When my hub and I purchased our first home two family members loaned us some money to complete the purchase. We both felt so indebted, within the first year we had paid back both parties. One family member said, in all their years of giving/lending we were the only ones to pay back. I loved that. I never want to take advantage of an extravagant giver.
5) Remember when... Lastly, I think I have a hard time receiving because I never want to have a gift held over my head. In tough times, I never want someone to say, "Remember when I gave you ____?" In a sense I don't want to feel owned by someone's giving. Maybe it's pride? Who knows?
This whole experience has caused me to once again reflect on salvation- the most amazing, free, no strings attached GIFT of all! When I was 8-years old I accepted Christ. My world was full of faith and I wanted to have a relationship with Christ, although I did not understand what this meant. Through my teen years and early 20's I ditched much of my faith for the world. The result was a BIG, tangled mess of a life.
In my mid-twenties my relationship with Christ got back on track. I recommitted my life and began the slow journey back. I strongly believe God allows growth at a rate which you can handle. I had a lot of learning to do and a lot of dealing with my "stuff."
I think the hardest thing I dealt with accepting was grace. I didn't allow myself much grace and could not imagine a Holy God pouring out grace on such a wretch as me.
A memory from about 20 years ago that is etched in my mind was the night I REALLY understood and embraced this salvation Christ was offering with no strings attached; no expectations in return; nothing to be earned; just a free gift! I had just finished an evening class at Bible Study Fellowship. I don't remember what we were studying or what the lecture was even about. All I remember was going to my car; sitting in the driver's seat; and being hit with the enormity of the gift Christ poured out on me.
I had this vision of Him saying, "Bring it; all your heartache; all you sin; all your stuff you don't want the world to see or know about; Bring it! I will take it. I willingly take your sin and shortcomings so you can be clean. I have made the sacrifice. Release it."
Up to this point, I don't think I truly understood the sacrifice Christ made for me. Yet, in my car I sensed Perfect Jesus so lovingly letting me know He died for my sin so I could be free from the heaviness and the burden of it. I couldn't imagine how he voluntarily would take on my yucky sins when he was without sin, but He promises to do so. There was nothing more I could do to earn freedom from this sin. I could not work my way out of it. I just needed to receive it!
Ephesians 2:8-9 reads,"For by grace you have been saved through faith-and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God; not by works, so that no one can boast."
The Bible tells us salvation is a free gift; not a gift through works.
For a gift giver; who does not receive well; who thinks all gifts must be earned; this is a concept that is really hard to embrace.
Over the years I've accepted God's gift and embraced it with gratitude, but this Christmas I feel like he's wanting me to learn to accept gifts from others. It's a strange thing and really difficult.
A dear friend, who has been so generous, recently said to me something like, "This is your time to receive the gift."
Although difficult, I am trying. Breaking the faulty thought processes attached to receiving is hard.
I'm hoping 2012 brings new lessons to learn, but for today I will be filled with gratitude!
Thank you Mikey, Mom, Dad, Gommer P., Gommer Wally, Grandpa Wallace, Jama, Suzie, Denise, Jennifer and John, and my three amazingly giving children!
I hate The Vest. There are few things in life I really dislike to the point of using the "H" word, but the vest is one of them.
First off, I should explain The Vest. Like many Washingtonians, my Grandma has a fleece vest. I don't even know how many years she's worn the vest. It's like it's always been. My Grandma...The Vest.
Being from Washington, fleece is the fashion wear of choice. It's warm. It seems to wick the rain. It's easy to find. It hides unwanted pounds. The benefits are countless.
I'll admit, before moving to California I had a red, boxy, unflattering fleece pull-over that was like a security blanket. No matter what size I was, the fleece covered it. I could be 40 pounds heavier, wear the fleece and no one knew the difference. The fleece was cozy, and warm, but it was also unflattering, worn and tired. Despite some reservations, I moved it out and surprisingly haven't missed it.
I realize people have favorite clothes they continue to wear despite how they look. I'm sure the What Not To Wear folks would have a heyday in my closet! There are those favorites that are just so cozy, you can't help but wear at night or when it's cold outside. I have a pair of awful, yet cozy, black, fleece hammer pant sweats. They are completely unflattering, but on a chilly day, I'll wear them to the gym along with my REI blue mountain socks. I know the combo is a fashion faux pas, but they're comfortable and cozy and nothing else seems to matter.
Like my red fleece pull-over or black hammer pant sweats, my Grandma has a tan, tired, old, worn-out, dingy, boxy, unflattering, did I mention ugly, fleece vest. She loves this piece of clothing. She loves that it has "inside" pockets. Inside pockets are the backs of outside pockets that have to have a place to go. She stashes her phone in her "inside pocket" when she walks with her senior friends. She wears little angel pins on the collar in memory of family members who have passed away. Along with the vest, she wears a white, long-sleeve, ribbed turtleneck. She actually owns three identical white turtleneck sweaters. The white sweaters, along with the fleece vest, a pair of light blue jeans and white Easy Spirits equals "The Uniform."
This photo was taken years ago. The uniform with a blue ribbed turtleneck.
She's worn this uniform for years and she LOVES it!
Last Christmas when she visited, I took her shopping looking for a replacement vest. We searched high and low from Macy's to Eddie Bauer to JCPenney and beyond, but there was no vest to be found that was roomy enough and met the "inside pocket" criteria.
We did find her a couple new ribbed turtleneck sweaters to offer her some different color options. I doubt she's ever worn them. My guess is they are folded beautifully in her drawer along with the MANY other beautifully folded, new sweaters we've tried to introduce into her wardrobe.
Prior to her visit, I called her to let her know I planned to take her to see Andrea Boccelli and Dr. Phil. We had to discuss wardrobe requirements and ideas. According to the Dr. Phil show guidelines, audience guests were asked not to wear white as it doesn't show up well on camera. In addition, the fleece vest isn't Andrea Boccelli material, so she needed to bring some more options.
With my mom's help, she packed some very cute dressy clothes. Thank you mom! I was secretly hoping "The Vest" wouldn't make the trip down to SoCal, but that was a lot to ask for.
I spoke with my mom the morning of my Grandma's flight. My mom told me, "She'll be there in her uniform. She's so excited!"
The Vest was coming back for it's third Christmas in SoCal.
Bummer!
When we picked my Grandma up she was wearing her light blue jeans, white Easy Spirits, white turtleneck and gray coat.
We went out to lunch, stopped by the Goodwill (her favorite place), and then headed home.
She unpacked and settled in.
She then came to me and asked where she had put her vest.
I hadn't seen the vest at this point, and hadn't even missed it.
She searched multiple times through the car and her suitcase, but did not find the beloved vest.
She thought she definitely left the vest hanging in the restroom of the airport.
I called. No vest.
I didn't want to celebrate the vest's demise, but I strongly feel everything happens for a reason. Just like the time our son spit his pacifier down a flushing toilet and it was bye-bye binky; it was time to break the bond with the vest. It was meant to be! The vest was gone.
Sadly, she was torn up about the vest. A couple times while sitting in the rocker thinking she'd say, "I sure miss my vest."
Poor Grandma, she did love that vest.
When she left I went on a shopping hunt.
I found a PERFECT, new, black, Columbia fleece vest WITH inside pockets. I took a photo of it; emailed it to my mom. We had thought we found the PERFECT replacement that my Grandma would love!
I packaged it up and shipped it out. She would be so surprised! I was excited!
THEN, I got the call.
My heart sank.
The Seattle airport had found her vest.
RATS!
I guess the super-cute, black fleece vest I got her will sadly join the bowels of her drawers folded neatly alongside the other perfectly folded new clothing we've all bought her over the years.
The Vest is back.
Do you have a favorite piece of clothing like my Grandma's vest that you know you shouldn't wear, but it just feels too good?
Maybe 2012 is a good year to spruce up the wardrobe and move out those pieces that have served their time. Let them rest. Find something cute and flattering and say good-bye to tired and worn.
We live in a Santa culture. It's the truth. And as much as I don't care for the over-materialized frenzy December brings, it doesn't appear to be falling out of fashion.
Our kids grow up singing, "You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why...Santa Claus is coming to town." They watch shows like The Grinch,The Santa Claus,Rudolph and of course,Santa Claus is Coming to Town. We hang stockings, write wish lists and letters, and set out cookies and milk before bedtime on Christmas Eve. We visit Kris Kringle better known as Santa Claus at local malls, whisper wishes in his ear and have our photos taken with him.
Our kids with Santa
This year I surprised my Grandma and told her she was also having her photo taken with Santa.
She was a little embarrassed, but also seemed a little excited!
It really is a crazy thing if you think about it, but this is what Christmas American tradition looks like and I'm guessing there are similar themes around the globe. Worldwide, Santa may have a different name, but children still await the magical experience and the gifts.
I love the story of the original Santa, St. Nicholas, and share it with our kids. The sacrifice he made to help others is admirable.
So, St. Nicolas, the first true Santa was a gift-giver! Giving the gift, providing for the dowry of three young women so they could marry and not be sold into slavery.
Thinking on the dowry...although we don't have a necessary dowry requirement in our culture any longer, around the world this tradition continues. Years ago, I helped raise money for some friends in Uganda to pay a dowry of cows, goats, fruit etc. A friend of mine is currently helping a young man in Uganda raise his dowry so he may marry. St. Nicholas would be proud!
The couple we helped now have two beautiful girlies!
Back to Santa...
On the night before Christmas, our daughter set out a plate of cookies and cup of milk. After setting out the treats, she proceeded to place an important letter she wrote to Santa next to the treats.
Her letter read:
hi Santa i have a question
was there a hole bunch of santa's or just one
check yes or no
and if yes plese say how many and plese wake me up to see you
yes___ no___
how meny?
The letter was genuine and heartfelt. She anticipated his visit, but even more hoped for a response.
The next morning she rushed downstairs to see if he had responded.
Here's what she found...
Dearest Arabella,
Merry Christmas!
You are such a smart young girl! That’s what I love about you. I heard about your big win with the essay contest. Well Done!
So your question…How many Santa’s are there? Well, my dear, there is just one yet there are many people in your life who show you love, generosity and joy. We all work together to make this life magical, exciting and a much better place to live in.
I love your honest questions, childlike faith and heartfelt curiosity. Hold on to these traits.
I am sorry My Dear, but I can’t visit. I must be off! Hawaii is waiting for me!
Blessings to you!
And always remember who were celebrating this season- Jesus! He is the giver of All Good and Perfect Gifts!
You are Loved!
So there was the response. She was very excited about it and stashed it away in her "box" where all good things are kept.
Parenting can sometimes bring up tough questions. I don't honestly know how to answer every question that comes up. There are instances where I'm not sure if we're doing the right thing or not.
Determining how one chooses to handle and/or answer questions surrounding Santa is up to each particular family. There are absolutes in life and ultimately the truth is the best answer, but I like to preserve wonder and merriment when possible too.
There was a St. Nicholas. He was a gift giver. Additionally, there are people in our lives who work to bring about joy in keeping the magic of the season alive. Christmas is a magical season! We celebrate God coming to earth as a baby born unto a virgin! WOW!
It is all about Jesus, and it's also about gifts, family, celebration and fun!
Some explanations are best left to be dreamed of and wondered about. The joy in our child's eyes, her innocent questions, and the hope she has is a surprisingly wonderful gift to us.
Oh my word! Has this month just flown by or what? My kids have reminded me once again there are only 2 days until Christmas (really just one since all the festivities are tomorrow). Unbelievable! I don't like how quickly the days have passed. This isn't what I had envisioned for our December.
Every year I hope to EXPERIENCE Christmas in some sort of amazing way. My vision is to not procrastinate. In the perfect world I'd have presents wrapped, cookies baked, and cards sent by December 1st. Every week we'd light an advent candle and focus on why we're celebrating: Christ's birth. Then I'd spend the next 24 days laying under the tree, gazing at the lights, playing games with our kids and listening to Christmas music until we fall asleep. It all sounds so beautifully romantic. Love it!
But...
That's not my life at all.
Instead, it's December 23 and I'm behind, or maybe I'm on time (Kim time). I remind myself, every year there is onlyone year to plan and prepare, yet I still can't seem to pull it together. Recently, I read a post about moms who do a whole lot of Crazy Elf on the {Stinkin'} Shelf thing. I do not know even what this is, but there's no way I could squeeze it into the schedule. Here's the link to the funny read, minus the *!@#$%^!! words.
In contrast here's my current "To Do" list update:
I just got the Christmas cards out yesterday. Hopefully friends will receive them by the 24th, but there's no guarantee.
Packages were just mailed in the last couple days. I hope they arrive on time too. Day after delivery just isn't as exciting as before Christmas delivery.
I didn't do much baking. I did make gingerbread cookies twice, and they're cut outs, so I think they count for double points. I really wanted to give baked goods as gifts to neighbors, milkman, postman and garbage man, but it hasn't happened yet and we won't have garbage day until after Christmas. Poor garbage man.
We never got around to the advent thing. Our kids know it's about Jesus. I have to be okay with that.
I had hoped to read a book a day to the kids with a Christmas theme. Well, we only read two Christmas picture books, but they were good ones: The Polar Express and Twas the Night Before Christmas. I realize neither one was about Jesus. I hope our kids get what this celebration is all about; now that I think on it again.
I really wanted to laugh (since I can turn into a stressed-out-grouchy-Christmas-prep mom) and watch Elf as a family. It was on the advent calendar. We received it from Netflix, then we lost it. It's here somewhere, but no one is 'fessin' up to where they stashed it.
And because we can't find Elf to mail back, we aren't able to watch the other Christmas movies in our Queue. Bummer! Guess we'll have to watch them in January and pretend it's still the Christmas season.
Then there's the crafty gift project I started 3 years ago. I was going to complete it this year. It's still in the closet. RATS!
I just sat down to look at the Christmas game/toy catalog. Perhaps I'll make the online order today and place the invoice in a box for the kids. That's pretty lame, I know. Merry Christmas! Your gifts should arrive in 7-10 days.
Since I have so much to do in preparation for Christmas and feel overwhelmed over it, I think I'll procrastinate a bit more and ponder a few of my Top Christmas Songs.
In years past, it seems like there were radio stations dedicated to month-long Christmas music. It doesn't seem like it's the case anymore. We've listened to Pandora Holiday Music channels. It's been nice, but I haven't been playing my fave Christmas tunes, so I thought I'd blog them. By blogging them I feel like they're getting much deserved attention.
These favorites may not be your favorites, but I like them. I was raised listening to these tunes and despite some of the crazy lyrics, I LOVE THEM! Not included are favorites like Michael Buble, Manheim Steamroller, Bing Crosby, etc. The only songs that made it to the list are the ones I've listened to over 1000 times (I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea).
I'll count down from #10-#1. #1 being my current favorite.
10. It's Christmas All Over The World by New Edition
Okay, I know I'll probably get the cheesey award for this one, but I was a big New Edition fan! The video quality here is pretty crummy, since it's a Solid Gold recording. Someone must have had it on VHS. Check out the moves!
9. All I Want For Christmas Is You by Mariah Carey
I had to do it! Mariah & Christmas music from the 90's! But here's an updated {somewhat creepy} of Mariah and Justin Beiber. There's a huge part of me that feels despite how fabulous Mariah looks, looking sexy with the Beib singing All I Want For Christmas Is You is just Mary Kay Latourneau-ish creepy.
8. Christmas Wrap by the Waitresses
This song just may be on the obnoxious Christmas song list for some, but it brings back great 80's memories for me. It reminds me of high school, turtlenecks, crew neck sweaters and wandering the snowy streets of an extremely small mid-western town.
7. Rocky Mountain Christmas by John Denver
I have to give #7 to a whole album. This is one of my all-time favorite albums; probably because I grew up listening to it. My hub hates it! I torture him with the songs of Aspenglow and of course Please, Daddy Don't Get Drunk This Christmas. Not sure how that's a Christmas song and I never had a drunk daddy so this song never bothered me. It was just another track on the album. John Denver was a favorite at our home when I was growing up and I'm still sad he's no longer here.
6. Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant
This song is written in Mary's perspective. I love that! I desperately want to know what she thought and how she felt to be chosen to carry Jesus. This video was recorded at the Crystal Cathedral. I took my Grandma there a couple years ago to see their Christmas program. We had another great experience!
5. The Prayer by Celine Dion with Andrea Boccelli
The lyrics to this beautiful song are amazing! May this always be our prayer!
I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go
And help ;us to be wise in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe
I pray we'll find your light, and hold it in our hearts
When stars go out each night,
remind us where you are
Let this be our prayer, when shadows fill our day
Help us find a place guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
A world where pain and sorrow will be ended
And every heart that's broken will be mended
And we'll remember we are all God's children
Reaching out to touch you
Reaching to the sky
We ask that life be kind, and watch us from above
We hope each soul will find another soul to love
Let this be our prayer, just like every child
Who needs to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Needs to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
4. O Holy Night by Celine Dion
"Fall on Your Knees" Brings me to tears. If you have a relationship with Christ and really know him, this song has such a special meaning. I know all heaven and earth celebrated the birth of God's son! "Let all within us praise His name. Christ is the LORD!"
3. Mary Did You Know performed by Greg Otterholt
I think the first time I heard this song Greg was singing it. We were blessed to get to know he and his wife years ago when I was selling real estate. He has an amazing voice!
I love this song because the lyrics ask the questions floating around my mind. I would love to sit down with the heroins of the Bible and soak them up, ask them what it was really like and gain their perspective.
2. Sleigh Ride by Arthur Fiedler's Philharmonic
This song reminds me of being a kid. Listening to the clomping noises thrilled me. AND the best part is the "neigh" at the end!
1. How Many Kings by Downhere
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE this song! I can't get enough of it! When I listen to it, tears run down my cheeks. I'm so honored to have such a King!
Well, back to reality. Wish me luck as I try to conquer the unfinished in my life. AND....as if I didn't have enough to do I scheduled a mammogram for today!
Finding a GREAT idea and keeping it on your desktop for future reference is a handy way to grab it when you're ready to use it. I've found fabulous ideas on Pinterest that I can't wait to try!
But sometimes these ideas are great for moms who do laundry, but not so great to display to strangers I don't know.
Yesterday I went to my first "find out how to use your computer" session and "Ralph" asked me to turn on the computer to get started. The next thing that happened was "the page" popped up.
Now, to many of you, this would have been no big deal. I know it would be no big deal to my mom or my husband, but it was completely embarrassing to me.
Another moment of realness on the blog-o-sphere.
HI, my name is Kimberly and I'm perpetually embarrassed. Normal everyday life occurrences embarrass me. I can't even begin to mention the ways humiliation enters everyday life; it's probably on a stratospheric scale. Even when I tell myself, "It's no big deal." I get embarrassed- like sweaty, heart-pumping embarrassment.
I really believe most of life's little imperfections are rooted in a few big categories of human frailty.
Embarrassment= Insecurity
Insecurity permeates many facets of everyday life. It's really annoying and I wish I could just shrug it off with a laissez-faire attitude, but I don't roll that way. Bummer!
My hub and I were watching "Selling L.A." the other night and I was watching the L.A. Chic gals thinking how stylish and sophisticated they were. Their inner geek didn't spring out unexpectedly like mine does so often. Even in a moment of trying to pull off having it together, something will appeal to my wacky sense of humor, laughter will ensue and perhaps a snort will escape. A total give-away that I'm a goofy girlie!
Back to Ralph. I was trying to play it cool and act like no big deal that a page entitled "Goodbye to Yellow Armpit Stains" just popped up on my computer. Embarrassing! I'm sure he wanted to know too, but wanted to be professional. It's not like it's a big deal to most people, but normal bodily function stuff happens to embarrass me. C'est la vie!
So, in my attempt to face my insecurities head on, I'm going to post this page. I think it's great information for a cleaning lady like myself and I'm hoping it will help with the stains on my boys' baseball pants too.
Thank you Jillie for posting this entry. Sensitive cleaning mommas need to know.
As a worrying parent I can't even tell you how many times I've offered gentle reminders to our kids:
Where's your helmet?
Slow down.
Is your seatbelt on?
Don't throw balls in the house.
Ride on the sidewalk.
Don't dart out in front of cars.
Don't dive in the shallow pool.
Don't stand on basketballs, or soccerballs.
My oldest just reminded me of the one I told him yesterday, "Whatever you're thinking...DON'T DO IT!"
I hate to sound like a broken record, but it pains me terribly when they get hurt.
Today, after our homeschool classes, our middle boy went out to play basketball with some buddies. I was tidying up my classroom and chatting with a fellow homeschool mom who happens to also be a doctor. Unexpectedly, one of our son's friends came up to the classroom and said our son was hurt and needed me.
We rushed downstairs and there I found my sweetheart in tears with a gash in his knee and blood running down his leg. I had my friend take a look at it; she gave me the "stitches" nod.
We then rushed to the local urgent care which was packed. Jumping back in the car, we headed to the next urgent care.
After a short wait we were seen.
"How did this happen?" asked the nurse.
The Gash
"I was standing on a basketball and fell off," said our son.
Soon, thereafter, the doctor came in. She took one look at it and made the necessary preparations to stitch it up.
Sitting beside my sweetheart, wiping the tears rolling down his face as the doctor gave him numbing injections made me wish I could protect him from all pain. There's nothing I could do but pray with him and wait for her to sew him back up.
All stitched up
As a mom I try my best to prepare, instruct and equip our kids for whatever they may encounter. Sometimes there are some lessons they have to learn at the school of hard knocks.
In the car on the way to the clinic, our son said to me, "This is a life lesson learned."
So true.
Hopefully he won't stand on a ball anytime soon.
And the moral of the story is... Don't stand on basketballs. And, sometimes it pays to listen to your momma.
