Wishing for the Back Peddle in Life

It was 1986.  Southern Illinois across the river from St. Louis.  I packed up my royal blue '73 VW Super Beetle and followed my mom in her Dodge Caravan and my dad in his red '64 Volvo 544.

This looks exactly like my dad's car

Here's my bug...and my friends from high school.
Not sure what they're doing. I think they're breakdancing.

We were packed and heading west.

Truth be told, I'm a west coast girlie.  Born in Washington, raised mostly between Washington and California, but I spent three years in small-town mid-America where I graduated from high school and attended my first year of college.

In those three years, I became a mid-west girl.  I loved it SO MUCH!  I had amazing friends.  I had acclimated to the heat and humidity along with the miserable deathly cold winters.  I planned on growing old in Southern Illinois, sitting around the table with my midwest girlies talking about small town life, and having my kids know about corn fields and lightning bugs, but my plans were abruptly changed.

In the summer of 1986 my dad received orders (military Colonel) to head west.  I was going back to the familiarity of the Pacific Northwest, but my heart wanted to stay in the midwest.

Much to my despair and objection, we packed up and headed west across the U.S.

My heart was being ripped out.  I think it somehow broke.  The grief set in.

I loved the life in the midwest.

Following our departure, sadly, I entered the worst years of my life.  I won't go into how bad they were.  Just know....They sucked!

Then in 1988, life began improving.  I transferred to a great college, met the love of my life, and the rest is history, or so they say.

Fast forward 20+ years.

We're living the BEST LIFE ever!  To be honest, I think we live in paradise.  The last three years have gone by in a blink and they have brought me countless moments of joy.  Life in the O.C. has been completely dreamy.

Never in a million years did I think we'd ever live anywhere but the west coast.  I find comfort knowing the ocean is close.  I love seeing the water.  The sunshine and moderate climate are appealing.  I consider myself a coastal girl.

But wait...

Transfer???

To where???

The Midwest???

Illinois??

Again???

I have long since let go of the midwest girl I once was.

I'm trying to wrap my head and heart around this one.

I'm trying to remind myself I have precious friends in the Land of Lincoln.  There are adventures to be had, opportunities to embrace!

But really, it's just my heart that is breaking.

The other night we went to a movie with some friends of my oldest son and one of the dads.

At the end of the movie, the friend's dad, a scruffy teddy-bear-of-a-guy and former undercover police officer hugged me and said, "Come back to California.  Come back to California."

I'd really like to.

Three years ago, when I moved back to California after years away, I got off the plane, took a deep breath, and thought, "I'm back!"  It felt good.  I feel like this is a land I belong in.

I hope there is good in store for us although right now it's tough to think of life somewhere else.

I'd really like to back peddle and somehow find a way to stay in Orange County.

Nothing's coming.

Pray for us as we enter this new chapter in our lives.

Prayer for our kids and my hub would be appreciated.  I grew up doing this...it's tough stuff.  Moving, finding a home, friends, church, school opportunities, sports programs, etc.  It can be overwhelming and we're feeling it now.

T-minus not so many days...

And counting.

Plane Crashes, Hurricanes, and Distant Memories

Friday Night is movie night at our house.  We've celebrated the end of the week for years with pizza, root beer, licorice, and a family movie.  As our kids are getting older we're able to watch movies that deal with heavier, sometimes more emotional, content and life lessons that add to interesting, thought provoking conversations.

This last week we watched We Are Marshall.  It is a tragic story about an airplane crash carrying the majority of the Marshall University football team along with coaches, athletic directors, and boosters.  The lost life and shattered dreams threatened to destroy a football program, school and town.  The first few minutes leaves viewers speechless and heartbroken.  As the movie progresses, we witness the resilience and renewed hope as the Marshall football team is rebuilt and the town begins to heal from the devastating circumstances that could have left them crushed without inspiration or a future.

While watching it, I couldn't help but think of a similar airplane crash that occurred when I was a child living on the small island of Terceira, Azores.

There are some monumental events, like hurricanes, I vaguely remember during our time living in the Azores, 1974-1976, but first I'll reminisce the fond memories I have while living on "The Rock." 

I remember:

• Sliding down hillsides on cardboard veering to miss the large volcanic rocks.
• The giant volcanic rock wall behind our house and catching the lizards that occupied the crevices.
• The Portuguese people digging through our garbage regularly for just about anything they could reuse. 
• The flowers they'd make from old wire hangars and discarded nylons.
• The smell of fig trees and geraniums that bloomed like perennials.
• Hydrangeas, AMAZING hydrangeas.
• Spending the whole summer at the pool.
• Seeing a submarine out in the ocean wondering if it was a Communist invasion.  It probably wasn't, but my imagination thought it might be. 
• Our neighbor girl getting lice and her maid picking the nits out.  She was the first person I ever knew to get lice.
• Wanting a dog, but the island dogs were something crazy. 
• Communist propaganda pasted all over the white-washed walls in the towns outside the base.
• Walking past guard shacks on my way to school everyday.  The Portuguese soldiers made me uncomfortable.
• Being able to walk all over the base because military bases felt safe and secure.
• Every Saturday going to the matinee and buying a Sugar Daddy.  It lasted longer than any other candy option and seemed like the most economical choice.  After the movie, I'd walk up and down the aisles looking for lost change. 
• Our maids, seamstresses and gardeners.  Some had teeth, some didn't.  Some showered, some didn't.  We went to the home of one of our maids.  She had a dirt floor, no running water, no electricity.  She still smiled through a toothless grin and had joy.  Our seamstress could make a complete outfit just by taking measurements and creating a pattern from a brown grocery sack.  She could whip out an outfit in a day and she'd make matching clothes for my dolls!
• Ox pulled carts on cobblestone roads.
• Having to go to the MARS station to call the states and saying "Hi Grandma, over." 
• Not having ice cream, fast food, or a live Christmas tree. 
• Having birthday parties and receiving 3 of the same thing because it was all there was to buy at the base Toyland. 
• Not having television until evening.  Armed Forces Television and Radio had limited shows like Mannix, SWAT or Barnaby Jones.  I think we may have had Electric Company and Felix the Cat on Saturdays.  We watched this limited programming on a small, probably 10-inch black and white television.
• Waiting for Saturday so I could hear Casey Kasem's Top 40. 
• My parents going to Lisbon, Portugal for a get-away while we stayed back on the island with friends.  While in Lisbon, there was a coup.  My parents called and informed us they weren't sure when or if they'd be able to get out of the country.  This really scared me.  That could be another post.

I actually remember quite a bit.  Most of it was really great, but...There were scary things too.

One of the scariest things I remember were two hurricanes.  Hurricane Emmy and Frances.  I remember having to sleep downstairs because the wind blew so hard the four-plex we lived in swayed.  We were instructed to stay downstairs in the event the top floor blew off.  I also remember a plane crash.  My dad was called out to help.  Watching We Are Marshall got me to thinking about the plane crash.

With the help of the internet I've been able to find out more about what happened.  I've found the two scariest events we experienced while living there were related.

Hurricane Emmy developed on August 20, 1976 and reached her top speed of 100-105 mph and gradually weakened when absorbed by Hurricane Frances.  Emmy was the longest-lived hurricane of 1976.  Hurricane Emmy downed the Venezuelan Air Force plane that killed the 68 passengers aboard.  These 10 flight crew members and 58 passengers from a Venezuelan school choir were on their way to Spain when they attempted to land at Lajes Field in hurricane force winds.  The plane crashed into a hillside just one mile from the runway. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Aeroporto_das_Lajes,_costa_Norte_da_ilha_Terceira,_A%C3%A7ores,_Portugal.JPG

I found the following description of Emmy.

Hurricane Emmy, 1976



Storm Lifecycle


The tropical depression that became Hurricane Emmy developed on August 20 from a tropical wave, located about 1000 miles east of the Lesser Antilles. As it moved west-northwestward, the area strengthened to a tropical storm on the 22nd. On the 24th, it recurved to the northeastward, and strengthened to a hurricane on the 25th. Its eastward movement so early in the year is almost unprecedented, as it occurred from the rapid development of a low pressure system to its northeast. Emmy moved recurved back northwest on the 26th, but again moved eastward on the 29th, when it reached its peak of 100 mph. More » It gradually weakened, and on September 4, a weakened extratropical Emmy was absorbed by the larger circulation of Hurricane Frances while located over the Azores. Hurricane Emmy caused 68 indirect deaths when a Venezuelan Air Force plane carrying a school choir crashed on a landing attempt at Lajes Air Base in the Azores during the storm. This makes Hurricane Emmy the fifth documented storm to have downed an airplane (the others were Hurricane Janet, Typhoon Emma, Hurricane Betsy and Hurricane Esther)[citation needed]. Like Emmy, the tropical depression that became Hurricane Frances formed from a tropical wave on August 27, while midway between the Lesser Antilles and the coast of Africa. The next day, it became a tropical storm, and on August 30, Frances became a hurricane. As it recurved to the north and east, Frances reached her peak of 115 mph on September 1. Steady weakening occurred afterwards, and Frances became extratropical on the 4th.

Hurricane Frances reached her peak speed of 115 mph on September 1, 1976!  Wow!  I remember hearing the gauge that measured wind speed was blown off.  I don't know if that was true or not.  I just remember everything that was not nailed down was blown.  I seem to remember even vehicles being moved by the wind.  Now, thinking of it, I seem to recall a woman being blown around while on the street.  Is that true, or a dream?

But watching We Are Marshall, I'm reminded of my dad responding along with other emergency response personnel to the downed aircraft.  Hurricane Emmy was the fifth documented storm to down and airplane according to Stormpulse.  What a sad, life-changing day! 

I am glad that with the help of the internet I can find answers to the questions that have occupied my thoughts over the past many years.  I can't help but wonder about the Venezuelan school (Venezuelan choir Orfeon Universitario) and if they recovered and healed like Marshall University.

Milestones

Today the boys in our family headed to the mountain and my girl and I stayed home. To make our day more eventful and not just a sit-around-the-house kind of day, we decided to take in a movie and wander around the mall.
We're now at the place where we can walk together. Gone are the days of strollers and diaper bags packed in the back of the car. We now shop together and my little princess loves to take a trip to the "fitting room" to try on clothes. She loves that she is growing up, but I'm trying to put on the breaks and slow this train down.

After this week of making it to the learning how to ride a bike milestone, I've reflected on the other milestones our youngest is achieving. It feels as if I'm soaking her in more because I don't want to miss anything or more importantly not remember every detail of our kid's lives.

I've loved having the opportunity to teach her how to read this year. Teaching a child how to read is usually not my favorite thing to do. It's very slow and can be frustrating, but for some reason I'm really enjoying it. I love watching her little mouth as she's trying to produce the "th" or the "f" sounds. With the "th" her tongue comes out sometimes spittle flies...it makes me laugh. Or the way she tries to sound out the word "old" but always says "load" when she tries to prounounce it. We get a chuckle out of it now. Her brain must mix the letters up in the process from sounding to saying.

Oh, and I love looking at her little arms. Her skin is so soft and I can still see the faint dimples in her elbows...so precious!

Yesterday when we were driving in the car she realized she has a tooth that is beginning to wiggle quite a bit. She still has all her baby teeth. I asked her if I'd still recognize her if she lost some of her teeth. She reassured me that I'd still know it was her because she can still recognize her friends who have lost their teeth. But what she didn't realize is I'm thinking of the "little girl" face I'm so familiar with. Will she lose that with the teeth and start looking like a "big girl?"

I wonder if every mom who realizes her time with her kids is quickly slipping by thinks on these things? I know I do. I'm grateful for the opportunity to spend every day with these precious gifts and really KNOW them. What a blessing!!