Struggling Through November

November is a hard month.  The signs of winter shrouding the sky with clouds of heaviness, the naked trees lacking fullness and signs of life, and the brevity of daylight remind me that we will soon bring another year to close.  Where did it go? What did I accomplish?  Was it meaningful?

The heaviness of this month is accompanied by our anniversary.  I know it should be a reason to celebrate, but again I question whether or not this year's journey glorified God and made and impact for his kingdom. Quantifying such a measurement can be daunting.  Man's measurement and God's are completely different.

Measuring worth and eternal impact plagues me in the month of November.  I know the Bible warns us not to do this.  In Isaiah 55:8-9 The Lord tells us:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
⁹ “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Like Wildflowers, We Bloom and Die

Psalm 103:15 Our days on earth are like grass; like wildflowers, we bloom and die.

This week we finished reading Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls.  For a dog lover this book is a heart warming yet heart wrenching read!  Through the pages we fell in love with Old Dan and Little Ann. Their antics, battles, victories and most importantly their relationship with Billy left us desiring the company of man's best friend in our home.  We lost our beloved family member, Sam, about five years ago and there's still a void in our hearts.

I read aloud to the kids nearly everyday and the kids know my emotional sensitivities get the best of me on a regular basis.  While reading, if something touches my heart, the next thing they know I'm fanning myself trying to hold back the tears.  The day before we finished the book I had to call it quits.  I was so choked up I couldn't speak or read. The tears were flowing freely.

Make Way for The Ducklings!

Finding the extraordinary amidst the ordinary.

Today was an ordinary day.  I dropped the kids off at Junior Guards, then headed to have the oil changed in the car.  Finished up at the auto shop and then headed for home.

On the way home the lane of traffic I was in came to a sudden halt.  I tried switching lanes, and then also promptly stopped.

Crossing the street was a proud momma duck with her precious 9 ducklings.  They looked so small and helpless clustered close behind their momma.  They were headed to the local park.

Heart Changes

I think I could be in the process of a heart change, maybe a growth spurt, or maybe like The Grinch, my heart is growing more love and compassion.

After reading Francis Chan's book Crazy Love last year, I was impressed to do something in service to the homeless.  In that previous blog entry I shared my feeling about the homeless and about specific homeless folk in our area.

We've been faithful handing out baggies and backpacks (We have an abundance of drawstring backpacks we've been using too.  They work great!) filled with goodies when we come in contact with the homeless.  The kids really love it.  They're always disappointed if we see a homeless person and don't have a baggie.  I hear, "Mom, we need to get another baggie in the car."

Yes we do.

This year Francis Chan spoke twice at our church.  One service was a pre-Easter worship service and the other was on Easter morning.

Heartfelt Gratitude

I'm speechless...if that's possible.

This has been a year of thankfulness.

Even though I'd like to think I know myself pretty well, it's amazing how God continues to reveal aspects of inner thinking continually.  Just when I think I have most things figured out...I realize I don't.  One area I've realized He may be working on is the ability to receive graciously.

A few night's ago, as I was driving home from a friend's house, I was thinking on this last year and the generosity of family and friends.  I was overcome with overwhelming gratitude, but also a sense of overwhelming indebtedness!  Tears streamed down my face as I thought on recent gifts we've received.  Christmas may have brought on more emotions than normal, but I realized although I'm so grateful for the gifts, I also have a hard time receiving them.

I spent the last few days since the tearful drive trying to unpack the reservations I have with receiving.  Why is it so hard?  Why do I feel indebtedness along with gratitude?

Here's some of what I came up with:

1)  Receiving is difficult when I feel I didn't earn it.  I have a strong work ethic and value earning what is received.  If I didn't work for it, I have a hard time accepting it.

2)  I love giving. If you're familiar with the 5 Love Languages, giving is one of the ways I show love to others.  I love pouring out on others, but having others pour out on me is difficult.  I honestly feel bad for those giving.  Maybe there's a sense I don't feel worth the gift.  There are a number of stories of times I'm sure my parents could share of loser boyfriends taking advantage of an extravagantly giving girlfriend.  I think I've tried to justify this over the years, but deep down I think I internalized, I wasn't worth giving to.

3)  Keeping it even.  Like most people and family members I tend to keep it even. By keeping the giving even, no one feels left out.  I spend $25, you spend $25. Even! This type of giving allows all recipients to leave on balanced terms.  But, when I give a $25 gift yet receive a $100 gift, I feel awkward, and unbalanced.  The $25 gift, although nice, pales in light of the $100 gift.  When this happens to me I feel like a loser, baby!  Now, if I gave the $100 gift and received the $25 gift, no problem.  This practice is okay in my world.

4)  Payback.  When receiving an extravagant gift I feel like I need to write up an I.O.U.  When my hub and I purchased our first home two family members loaned us some money to complete the purchase.  We both felt so indebted, within the first year we had paid back both parties.  One family member said, in all their years of giving/lending we were the only ones to pay back.  I loved that.  I never want to take advantage of an extravagant giver.

5)  Remember when... Lastly, I think I have a hard time receiving because I never want to have a gift held over my head.  In tough times, I never want someone to say, "Remember when I gave you ____?"  In a sense I don't want to feel owned by someone's giving.  Maybe it's pride?  Who knows?

This whole experience has caused me to once again reflect on salvation- the most amazing, free, no strings attached GIFT of all! When I was 8-years old I accepted Christ.  My world was full of faith and I wanted to have a relationship with Christ, although I did not understand what this meant. Through my teen years and early 20's I ditched much of my faith for the world.  The result was a BIG, tangled mess of a life.

In my mid-twenties my relationship with Christ got back on track.  I recommitted my life and began the slow journey back.  I strongly believe God allows growth at a rate which you can handle.  I had a lot of learning to do and a lot of dealing with my "stuff."

I think the hardest thing I dealt with accepting was grace.  I didn't allow myself much grace and could not imagine a Holy God pouring out grace on such a wretch as me.

A memory from about 20 years ago that is etched in my mind was the night I REALLY understood and embraced this salvation Christ was offering with no strings attached; no expectations in return; nothing to be earned; just a free gift!  I had just finished an evening class at Bible Study Fellowship.  I don't remember what we were studying or what the lecture was even about.  All I remember was going to my car; sitting in the driver's seat; and being hit with the enormity of the gift Christ poured out on me.

I had this vision of Him saying, "Bring it;  all your heartache; all you sin; all your stuff you don't want the world to see or know about;  Bring it!  I will take it.  I willingly take your sin and shortcomings so you can be clean.  I have made the sacrifice.  Release it."

Up to this point, I don't think I truly understood the sacrifice Christ made for me. Yet, in my car I sensed Perfect Jesus so lovingly letting me know He died for my sin so I could be free from the heaviness and the burden of it.  I couldn't imagine how he voluntarily would take on my yucky sins when he was without sin, but He promises to do so.  There was nothing more I could do to earn freedom from this sin.  I could not work my way out of it.  I just needed to receive it!


Ephesians 2:8-9 reads,"For by grace you have been saved through faith-and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God; not by works, so that no one can boast."


The Bible tells us salvation is a free gift; not a gift through works.


For a gift giver; who does not receive well; who thinks all gifts must be earned; this is a concept that is really hard to embrace.


Over the years I've accepted God's gift and embraced it with gratitude, but this Christmas I feel like he's wanting me to learn to accept gifts from others.  It's a strange thing and really difficult.


A dear friend, who has been so generous, recently said to me something like, "This is your time to receive the gift."


Although difficult, I am trying.  Breaking the faulty thought processes attached to receiving is hard.


I'm hoping 2012 brings new lessons to learn, but for today I will be filled with gratitude!

Thank you Mikey, Mom, Dad, Gommer P., Gommer Wally, Grandpa Wallace, Jama, Suzie, Denise, Jennifer and John, and my three amazingly giving children!

Meet Ivan

Meet Ivan

A number of years ago, God placed "the orphan" so heavily on my heart I could scarcely think of little else.  I read amazing stories of adoption, read blogs concerning orphans, prayed for and helped friends financially who were in the process of adoption and humbly asked God to make adoption a reality in our family.

I meditated on James 1:27

²⁷ Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

At that time, it was estimated that there were 143 million orphans worldwide. There is no way one cannot be astounded by such a number.  (See the rice post if you want to have a visual of 143 million).  I read a couple days ago the number is now hovering around 163 million!!

My heart aches for ALL these children who do not have a family to call their own.

The prayer became, "Lord, use us to reach the orphan."  Making a difference to one or a few of them is what each of is called to do.

Over the years we've met, hosted, sponsored and cared for orphans as God continues to bring them into our lives.

Our first encounter was with a group from Childcare Worldwide in 2006.  If you're not familiar with Childcare Worldwide, definitely check them out.  They're listed with a 5-Star rating from Ministry Watch.com

Childcare Worldwide formed the Ugandan Orphan's Choir to "bring a message of hope to American audiences through the traditional rhythmic dances and songs of Africa."

Back in September of 2006 our church scheduled to have the choir perform.  To defray costs, the choir asks churches to host the chaperones and kids.  I literally JUMPED at the opportunity when our pastor asked for volunteering homes.

After the church service, I walked up to him as a line of other interested families was forming.  I quickly let him know I sensed they were SUPPOSED to be at our home.

He agreed.

All five boys and the male chaperone to the choir were placed with us for a 2-3 day stay.

We cleaned,  readied our home, and welcomed the boys with open arms.

Little did I know, 2 days with these kids ROCKED my world.  My heart's desire to live out James 1:27 was fueled.

These boys arrived with nothing but a backpack, but they exuded JOY like I'd never seen before.  All of them had lost one or both of their parents to the AIDS epidemic. They were delivered from near disaster and placed in a Children's Village where they now received housing, food, clothing, character development and an education.

Prior to being rescued by Childcare, some of these young children (under 13) are found caring for their younger siblings because their parents have died.  Some of these children bury their own parents.  Some are left in the care of older grandparents who do not have the means nor the strength to care for them.  It's heartbreaking!

Childcare Worldwide steps in and offers these children hope for a better future.

One of these boys in particular found a place in our hearts.  His name is Ivan.  We were able to spend Christmas 2006 with Ivan and another boy from the choir, Alex. Both boys are dear to us.

Christmas 2006

With Alex

With Ivan

Alex helped me roll out lefse while the other boys played.  Sadly, we have not heard from Alex since his stay with us.

Alex: "This Chapati?"  Me: "No, this is lefse.  Another flatbread."

Although my husband has not received a heart for adoption as I have, when he met Ivan he said, "He would fit in our family."  Ivan's photo is on a shelf in our family room with other family photos.  We will forever think of him as a special member of our family.

This is the photo we received last year from Ivan.
He has GROWN so much!

Adoption of the kids from the choir is not an option, and adoption from Uganda is difficult to say the least, but we've been blessed to have the opportunity to stay in contact with Ivan and hopefully one day we will meet him again.

We've never learned much about Ivan and his life prior to coming to Childcare. What we do know is he has a genuinely kind disposition and became instant friends with our oldest son.

We got a letter from Ivan this week.  Ivan's now 16 years old and loves to play soccer.  He's doing very well in school.  Childcare Worldwide's goal is to have the children receive quality education and training in a profession so they may not just survive, but succeed!  I think Ivan will break out of the cycle of poverty and succeed in whatever he chooses!

If you feel a tug at your heart when you see kids like Ivan, do something about it. Visit Childcare Worldwide's website.  You never know when you'll get to meet your sponsored child.  We were able to meet our sponsored child, Caleb last year.  That's another story and another post.

Have a blessed day!

Take a Moment to Watch- It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over

Book Study: Number The Stars Week 4

Teaching the history and overwhelming magnitude of World War II and The Holocaust to 5th-9th grade students can be a daunting task.  I REALLY want them to experience what we're reading and not just take the information and answer questions.  Reality is, we cannot even begin to grasp the enormity of it, but we can do our best to learn about the era, those involved, the events and the heroes who risked lives for others.

Sadly, too often students hear dates, statistics and facts and it's in one ear out the other.  I know first hand this type of learning.  Along with elementary education, I majored in history in college.  I learned a lot, regurgitated it for a test, and then went onto the next course.  I really can't say I had a professor who made an impact on my learning or that I fell in love with learning in college.  This is sad.  I imagine it's the same for many students.

Working with our kids has taught me to LOVE learning.  I LOVE thinking about being a pioneer girl on the open plain.  I love wondering if I'd have what it would take to help with the Underground Railroad.  Would I have the courage of Harriet Tubman or Corrie Ten Boom?  I've walked trails in our home state imagining I was Christy heading up through the Appalachian Mountains to teach.  Even tonight as I was completing a grueling workout running 400 meters, in the dark, carrying a 35 pound weight, I was imagining I was running from the Nazis carrying one of my children. Perhaps, I've been reading a little too much about World War II.

I'm currently teaching a book study on Number the Stars by Lois Lowry.  When planning to teach on the Holocaust, I found the National Holocaust Museum a GREAT resource.  They have informative guidelines for educators.  The guidelines point out that it's important to discuss the four types of groups involved: victims, perpetrators, rescuers, and bystanders.  We've discussed "The Final Solution" and that 6 million Jews were killed, but I had a sense the enormity of six million wasn't being translated into people.  One activity we did this week was to try to provide a visual representation for six million.

Forgive me if rice seems trivial, but I thought it would represent the magnitude and enormity of the number.

I brought a two pound bag of rice to class.

I divided our small class into three groups.  I asked each group to count the grains of rice I measured out to them.  I gave one group one cup of rice.  The two other groups received one teaspoon of rice.  The one cup of rice proved to be too much to count manually so we did our own calculations.  The two groups who had one teaspoon of rice counted out about 250 grains for their one teaspoon of rice.

There are 48 teaspoons in one cup, so we multiplied 48 X 250 equaling 12,000.

There were 5 cups of rice in the two pound bag.  This calculates to about 60,000 grains of rice in the 2 pound bag!

In order to count to six million, the students would need how many two-pound bags of rice?  ONE HUNDRED!!

With each grain of rice counted I tried to visualize each one as a person.  This is beyond comprehension!  Unfathomable!

I hope the lesson made an impact for the students.  It hit my heart...HARD!

Nothing New Under the Sun

What has been will be again.

what has been done will be done again/

there is nothing new under the sun.

Ecclesiastes 1:9

This morning during our Bible time we read about Elisha prophesying to the future leader of Syria, Hazael in 2 Kings 8.  God allowed the prophet, Elisha, to see Hazael's evil heart and the murderous plan he had to kill the ruling Syrian king and then take the throne.  In seeing Hazael's future, Elisha also saw what the Syrian king would do to the Israelites.  I thought to myself...Syria.  Israel.  Conflict. Nothing new under the sun.

In the book study classes I'm teaching, one class is reading The Drinking Gourd (also included Follow the Drinking Gourd) and the other class is reading Out of the Dust.

In Follow the Drinking Gourd a family of slaves is risking their safety and their lives to reach FREEDOM.  Others assisting them working on the Underground Railroad are risking their lives and safety to help the slaves reach FREEDOM.  FREEDOM is valuable!  FREEDOM is worth risking your life just to attain.  I tell our kids and the students in my class to never take FREEDOM for granted.  It is lost all too quickly and is hard to gain back, just look at history...Please!

Having the FREEDOM to homeschool is such a gift!  I'm thankful for everyday that we live in a country where we can homeschool, but I never take it for granted as the right can be taken away.

On a quick search I found at least 39 countries where it is actually illegal to homeschool.  Included in the list are:

Germany, Greece, Albania, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Croatia, Georgia, Iceland, Netherlands, Spain, Lithuania, Romania, Sweden, Ukraine, Cuba, Greenland, Guatemala, Turkey, Brazil, and China to name a few.

Freedom is such a gift and if we truly examine history when people want for a change and turn over personal rights and freedoms to leadership or government in hopes that they'll be taken care of...they lose.  Remember, nothing new under the sun.  Just ask the Israelites what happened when they wanted a King and then make your way down the history timeline.

Before I leave the topic of slavery, let's not fool ourselves and think it's no longer around.  Just as evil is alive and thriving, so is slavery.  In fact, according to International Justice Mission,

More children, women and men are held in slavery right now than over the course of the entire trans-Atlantic slave trade: Millions toil in bondage, their work and even their bodies the property of an owner.

This is an outrage that it still exists.  Nothing new under the sun.

In the Out of the Dust book study we're all getting a glimpse of what true poverty, tragedy, and desolation look like.  The people who lived through the Depression and Dust Bowl experienced hardship I don't think any American now knows unless they lived through it in their youth.  We are a blessed and spoiled people.  We don't understand the hardship experienced in the 30's.  My heart aches for what Americans during this era experienced, but what amazes me is their willingness to work hard (for meager pay), persevere, and be strong during this tough time.  I've watched many videos from survivors of the Dust Bowl on Living History Farm. These were tough times!  What the farmers of Middle America experienced caused me to think on the plagues Egypt experienced.  In addition to dust storms, those in the Dust Bowl saw drought, destruction, grasshoppers eating everything, including their clothing, famine, then day turning into night, death, disease, etc.

Finally, thinking on the poverty of the era.  The families we're reading about in Out of the Dust basically lived in extreme poverty, yet if someone stumbled onto their doorstep, or if a baby was born, they continued to find ways to give.  If we turn back to history, God tells us, "There will always be poor people in the land. Therefore I command you to be openhanded toward your brothers and toward the poor and needy in your land."  Give to the poor, don't expect someone else to take care of it.  God's command was to us, the individual.  Doing without, scraping by, being creative in providing for yourself and your family is nothing new and in this process give some of what you're blessed with to someone else.

There are many other correlations I've seen through our learning, but these were the few that have occupied my thoughts.  Disunity, strife, conflict, poverty, slavery, greed...nothing new under the sun.

I cannot close on the negativity though.  I also believe that faithfulness, truth, perseverance, hard work, honesty, humility, surrender, obedience, giving, compassion, kindness, and sacrifice are nothing new under the sun.  We each just need to make a choice where we're individually going to invest ourselves.

Precious Thoughts

Our kids are feeling the bummed-ness and we're all trying to find some joy in our day.  I'm getting many offers for hugs.

Our little middle precious just stashed this under our door.

I think he wants me to take it to Starbuck's because Starbuck's makes a momma feel better. 

Love this kid!

Why CrossFit?

CrossFit is different.  It's unlike any sport I've ever participated in before.  If you have no athletic ability, you're welcomed.  If you're an amazing athlete, you're challenged to reach for the stars.  If you reach a goal, the whole gym will stop and cheer you on.  CrossFit is a sport where the top finishers cheer on those still working.  They don't seem to revel in their own glory, they go back for those behind.  Perhaps it is this mentality that makes CrossFit so unique.  CrossFitters praise the heroes, and anyone who is sacrificing and up for the challenge can be a hero.

This weekend we attended the 2011 CrossFit games.  This sport brings me to tears.  To say the elite athletes who competed are amazing is an understatement.  Somehow they are able to push themselves and their bodies to a level I've never encountered before.  They spend a weekend completing grueling workouts.  They do not even know what the workouts will be, so there is no preparation other than the countless hours, days and years they've invested at home, outside, or in the gym.  This weekend we saw everything from ocean swims, soft sand runs, handstand walking, softball throws, carrying water jugs, traversing monkey bars and more.  If it is outlandish and can be imagined, it might be a CrossFit event.

The last of the team events was tough to say the least.  The workout was:

Each member of the team will complete one of the following as a relay.

Female member 1
"Elizabeth"
21-15-9 reps of:
Clean 95 pounds
Ring dips

Female member 2
"Fran"
21-15-9 reps of:
65 pound Thruster
Pull-ups


Female member 3
"Isabel"
Snatch 95 pounds, 30 reps

Male member 1
"Grace"
135 pound Clean and Jerk, 30 reps

Male Member 2
"Diane"
21-15-9 reps of:
225 pound Deadlift
Handstand push-ups


Male member 3
"Karen"
150 Wallball shots, 20 pound ball

The way 21-15-9 works in "Elizabeth" is, the competitor has to do 21 reps of cleans, then 21 ring dips, then 15 cleans, 15 ring dips, 9 cleans, 9 ring dips and then tags the next person. 

There were a number of teams, but Team Rocklin and the struggles they encountered really showed the crowd what CrossFit is about. 

The first female competitor from Team Rocklin struggled with the ring dips.  Although her strength was evident, she was just not able to nail them.  While other teams were advancing through the relay, she remained back on the rings trying to complete her leg of the relay.  Her teammates encouraged her from their stations.  The look of frustration on her face was painful.  She'd jump, dip and then begin pushing herself up again, again, and again.  Countless times, the judge  gave her the "No" sign.  She'd shake out her arms grab hold of the rings hit it again.  As she'd dip down and try to push herself up the crowd began to cheer for her.  After some time, her teammates soon moved closer and were cheering and offering her words of encouragement.  Occasionally she'd get another rep, but there were far more failures than successes.

This is what the dips looked like.

And the girls completing the cleans.

As time passed, other teams were closing in on the finish of the relay.  Team Rocklin was still on the dips.  Amazingly, she didn't give up.  She kept at it.  Her teammates stayed around her, offering support.  The crowd continued to yell and cheer.  Team Rocklin was clearly in last place.  Twenty minutes or more had probably gone by.  Each team was only allowed about 35 minutes to complete the relay. 

The 2nd leg of the relay.

I began to tear up watching her, the crowd, and the other competitors.  It was truly moving!  Finally, she finished her dips and tagged the next person.  In the mean time, the first team finished the relay and rather than go off to celebrate their win, they surrounded Team Rocklin and began cheering.  The first gal sat on the arena floor.  I think she was crying.  She endured! 

Go Team Rocklin.

We all watched as Team Rocklin began chipping through the relay, but time ran out.  In CrossFit, I've learned that even when time runs out, the race is not finished until it's finished.  The crowd was going wild, cheering every victory they made.  It makes me cry just thinking about this.  They competed to the finish.  It would have been so easy to just give up and throw in the towel because they were so far back, but they were surrounded and encouraged to finish the race.

The other teams cheering on Team Rocklin.

There are so many life lessons to be learned by watching an event like this.  I love that CrossFit honors fallen heroes.  We complete workouts named in honor of soldiers who have made the ultimate sacrifice.  I think of them when I don't think I have it in me to finish.  If they could die for something they believed it, I surely can endure a few minutes of challenge.

When I think of the athletes I saw compete today they understood the pain and suffering their fellow competitors were going through.  They had been there and were going to support the others through it.  In life, when we've gone through a tough time and see another friend going through it, we should offer support. Come alongside your fellow man/woman and stick by them until they get through it too.  What a beautiful life lesson.

I read one comment tonight on this team event.  I think it was from CrossFit Centurion, "Seriously, Rocklin Crossfit showed amazing heart. When all the teams gathered around for RCF's final wall balls, I had a renewed faith in humanity." 

Couldn't we all use a little renewed faith in humanity.  Offer your support and walk beside someone going through a tough time.  You will not only be blessed, you'll bless all those who witness it.



Baggie #1 Finds A Home!

We had a couple errands to do today and while approaching a red light there was a man standing on the median.  We've never seen him before.

Our middle son said, "Mom, that's him!" and quickly reached for our baggie.  I guess he knew that was the person who was supposed to be the recipient of the baggie.

I rolled my window down.  The man glanced at me and took the baggie.  He didn't really smile.  He looked down.  His teeth were pretty bad.  My girlie said from the back seat, "Good thing we have toothpaste for him."

He continued to hold his sign.

We drove off.  Being the giver is a great thing.  We're blessed.

We're going to get more baggies ready.

Trying to Find Crazy Love Through a Baggie

The Baggie

I have a large gallon-sized baggie in the car.  The kids brought it home from church a couple weeks ago.  It is filled with hand sanitizer, snacks, personal hygiene items, and a Bible verse.  We prayed concerning the baggie asking God to allow this simple gesture of giving to bless someone.  We've been carrying it around for over a week now in the hopes of finding someone who may be in need. 

I'm going to be quite honest for a moment.  Don't pass judgement.  Thoughts that run through my head might be familiar thoughts that run through the minds of many Americans.

Before we had the baggie in the car, it seemed daily we were coming in contact with homeless people, or maybe they're just people with signs trying to look very pitiful.  To be quite honest they kind of annoy me.

One guy who sits at the post office is probably in his 20's.  He holds a sign that reads something like, "My wife and child are in a motel please help."  He actually used the word "Motel."  Motel just sounds bad.  Motel makes me think of dirty and gross.  It makes me think bed bugs and cockroaches.  Hotel sounds like a much nicer place.  Hotel sounds like crisp, white sheets and continental breakfast.  I wish he said his wife and child were in a hotel.  I wouldn't feel so bad for them.  I really wanted to go up to him and say, "Join the military, be a man and get a job."  I wondered if he really did have a wife and child in a motel.  Okay, maybe I'm heartless, but I'm being honest.  He looks workable.  When I see him, I'm dropping off packages of items I've sold on ebay.  I don't make a ton of money, but I do what I can to help our family out.  I'd pick weeds or clean toilets if it would help our family out.

Then there's the guy by the gas station who holds the sign, "I WANT BEERS."  That's honest.  I'm not giving him any money.  We heard a representative from The Lighthouse Mission speak a few years back about people with signs wanting money.  He cautioned us not to give them money as the money given might buy them their last drink.  He also told us there was help if they truly desired it, but they'd have to get cleaned up.

There's another lady at the post office who has her young child in the stroller.  She just says, "Peeese.  Peeeeeeeeeese."  I feel for her and her little one.

There's another guy at the post office I kind of like.  He's always looking for plastic and glass bottles to return for the deposit.  He's always got a smile on his face.  I overheard him talking with another guy one day.  They were talking about tough times.  Yes, we are in tough times.  We gave him food.

Then there are the people we see in front of grocery stores collecting money for the homeless.  I don't really like that they sit in front of the grocery store.  To be honest, I'm not sure about the motives.  We've seen them collect money, then put it in their own pocket.

In front of one of the major shopping areas in our town there is a guy who stands in the median and then comes up close to your window.  Pressure.  I feel like he invades my space.

So at what point do I look them in the eye, show compassion and give.  A huge part of me is reminded of the gypsies we encountered in Italy.  Okay, I was told they were gypsies, but can't confirm.  All I know is there was trickery, deception and theft going on.  We were told to beware.  In public places they would offer to sell you a magazine and the next thing you realize, you've been robbed. 

I just finished reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  A couple things stand out.  The book is about living a Christian faith that is sacrificial, loving, giving, different.  He calls Christians out from living lukewarm lives just giving God your leftovers into a faith that is surrendered.  He challenges Christians who think they're living a healthy faith and compares them to the Laodiceans, "who thought they had everything until Christ told them they were poor and wretched.  They were all about declaring, 'Look, we are healthy, have good families, or we go to church every week.' Obviously, it's not what you advertise that counts; it's what you are really made of."

He continues, "God's definition of what matters is pretty straightforward.  He measures our lives by how we love."  Furthermore Chan states, "True love requires sacrifice.  And our love is shown by how we live our lives; "Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." (p. 119 Crazy Love)

I love.  I love the orphans.  I love kids.  I love to give to organizations that help kids who are impoverished, destitute or who need support.  I love Childcare Worldwide.  They're a great organization that genuinely helps children survive and thrive.  I like giving to Childcare.  I'd sacrifice for Childcare Worldwide and orphans.

But am I willing to sacrifice for people who annoy me?  Do my actions show Christ's love?  My compassion meter doesn't go off when I see those mentioned earlier.  I'm being honest.  It's honesty Wednesday.  Are those folks just looking to take advantage?  I don't know.

I think back to one Thanksgiving when our small group collected and gave a large Rubbermaid bin full of food and household items.  We were all so excited collecting items for a family in need.  I had visions of a family that would be blessed and grateful to receive a healthy Thanksgiving meal.  (Maybe I've watched A Christmas Carol one too many times).  I was in charge of delivering the goods.  The address I was given was to a room in a Motel.  Yes, it was a dirty, gross motel.  I knocked on the door.  One person answered.  I introduced myself and told them I was from the church.  I glanced around the room and there were people laying on the bed.  The room was stuffy and stinky.  Fresh air was greatly needed.  I smiled and told them I'd return, but might need some help.  They all just laid there.  I went to the car and carried the bin inside.  Still they all just laid on the bed watching me.  I dropped off the remainder of the items and left.  No thank you.  No nothing.  I drove away thinking, "These folks took advantage of giving."

Later, when discussing the matter with others at church the consensus was, "Yes, they may have taken advantage, but we have NO IDEA how Jesus will use this time to bring about His Glory."  God may have used this as a seed to bring those folks closer to him.  Maybe they had no hope to even get off that bed or no joy to smile and greet someone.  We don't know their circumstances, but I need to trust that some good came from it.

So now the challenge for me is from page 118 of Crazy Love, "How would my life change if I actually thought of each person I came into contact with as Christ--the person driving painfully slow in front of me, the checker at the grocery store who seems more interested in chatting than ringing up my items, the member of my own family with whom I can't seem to have a conversation and not get annoyed?"  I'd like to add the person I come in contact with in the median or in front of the post office holding a sign wanting something.

Strangely enough, since we've had the baggie, we haven't run into anyone.  I've got the eagle eye out wondering who might need to be blessed with a baggie of hygiene items and snacks and we haven't seen anyone. 

Lastly, I'll share this quote from Crazy Love,

"But God doesn't call us to be comfortable.  He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through."

Where would you be if you went out of your area of comfort and sacrificed, waiting for God to come through?

More Inspiration- TOMS Shoes & Sunglasses

Last night we were blessed to attend a recorded taping of a Focus on the Family Feet on the Ground Event.  Brandon Heath started the night off with his awesome heartfelt music.  While he was singing "Give Me Your Eyes," I was reminded of a service class I taught at our local homeschool co-op.  This song was one of our theme songs for the class.  We prayed that we would have the eyes of Jesus to see the needs around us and to respond to those needs.  As a class we saw kids giving sacrificially, working to serve others, and then paying blessings forward to others.

Following the singing, we heard from Amon Kasambala, the CEO of Focus on the Family Africa.  Focus on the Family Africa has been so instrumental in African countries in helping care for the orphans, family education and community service. The mission is "Nurturing and Protecting Families in Africa through Outreach and Trustworthy Resources."  


Lastly, Jim Daly from Focus interviewed TOMS founder, Blake Mycoskie.  Here's a clip on the history of TOMS.

Blake shared his inspiration in starting TOMS, one of his many entrepreneurial efforts, and the success he has experienced.  He shared about his faith in Christ and his heart to reach others in a self-sustaining business.  To date, TOMS has given away over a million shoes worldwide!  Amazing!  Jim shared the verse from Luke 12:48 "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked."  Blake is living out this verse and his giving is an inspiration to us all.

I love the faces in the following short TOMS clip!  Such precious children.

A few weeks ago TOMS launched their next One For One product.  Watch this touching video:

All of us, has the capacity to give to others.  Today is a great day to look at ways we can serve.  Ask God to give you eyes to see a need.  Listen.  Be creative. Maybe it's a smile. Maybe it's making a meal for a neighbor who just had a baby. Perhaps it's opening up your home to an orphan. Or, maybe it's buying a pair of TOMS shoes or sunglasses so that one can be given away.  Whatever you choose to do, I'm sure through your sacrifice, it will be blessed.

Happy Giving!!

Out of Balance

Life of luxury. Million dollar mortages. Streets lined with Lexus, Mercedes, BMW, Cadillac. Private schools. Spas. Gardeners. Nannies. Housekeepers. White sandy beaches. Botox. Plastic Surgery. Implants. Teeth whiteners. Cocktails. Pottery Barn. Neiman Marcus. Sushi. Stilettos. Doggie Daycare. Excess. This is where I live.
I live in a world where I feel like I don't belong. We have a scratched up Honda and a Ford pick-up. We prefer to eat at home. I clean my own house, make our food, and take care of the kids God blessed us with. I do my own laundry. I mostly wear tennis shoes and prefer sweats and t-shirts. I like to compost and try to find places to plant a seed of lettuce just to feel like I have a garden. I choose to homeschool our kids. We are really simple people living amongst so much prosperity.
Devastation. Hopelessness. Death. Tears. Urgency. Crumbling buildings. Shattered lives. Hunger. Thirst. Sanitation issues. Disease. Relief coming? So much tragedy. Surgery without anesthesia. Crime. Violence. Aftershocks. What does tomorrow hold? This is what I see on television and read from people who have been to Haiti.
I sit at home feeling helpless. I sense an urgency to do something, but what?? Pray.
Just Pray.

What's Under the Christmas Tree?

Yesterday morning was a big day for kids around the US and possibly the world. The anticipation for what Santa will bring can cause kids sleepless nights (so they claim), anxiety (did we put the milk and cookies out? Did you hear something? Was that a bell ringing? I sure hope I was good this past year), and pure excitement. We tried to play down the whole Santa thing this year and play up the real reason we're celebrating-Jesus's birth. But, even with that being said, looking forward to the wonder or the fulfillment of wishes, hopes and dreams makes this the season of Hope. Even big kids hope that something will happen differently at Christmas time. I think we're geared for expectation and hope. But many people are lost not really knowing what they're supposed to be expecting or hoping for.
This year at Macy's they did a Miracle on 34th Street type of card writing to Santa. For each card written to Santa, Macy's donated $1 to the Make a Wish Foundation (I think this is correct). Anyway, our little daughter was so excited to write her letter. She wrote her "Dear Santa" asking for a couple of items. Then to add to it, I asked for something special, something that our dear daughter prays for regularly.
On Christmas morning our precious girlie came downstairs, took one look under the tree, and then surprised me. I thought she'd ask, "I wonder if Santa brought the present I asked for?", but instead she said, "I wonder if Santa brought what you (meaning me) asked for? I wonder if he brought the little baby girl from Africa for you. Maybe she's under the tree."
How precious is that!! No, we didn't have a little baby girl from Africa under our tree, but that would be quite awesome if we did. But we do have a seed of hope planted in our little girl's heart that hopes for new beginnings, compassion for others and a heart for sharing our family's love with others.