Sunday, October 09, 2011

Defriended or is it Unfriended? Again...

I was Facebook Defriended, or is it Unfriended?  It feels a bit like rejection, especially since it involved someone I've known a long time.

I must say I have been defriended before.  Roughly around the last presidential election, a person I hardly knew (went to Jr. High with her, but really had no clue about her) was ranting on people who post Bible verses in their status updates.  I piped in something to the effect, "They probably are just trying to encourage someone.  If you don't like what they are saying, the beauty of fb is you can overlook those posts."

She defriended me immediately.  My guess is she either didn't like Christians or Bible quoters, in general.  I wasn't even the Bible quoter, I was just stating people have a right to post what they want, and we can choose to overlook it or not.  I know jumping to that conclusion is supposition, but wouldn't you guess the same thing?

Anyway, all day I've wondered why I was defriended.  Was it because I'm a Conservative, or because I'm a Christian?  Is it because I have a blog, or because I cook?  Is it because I find joy in life, or because I'm crazy about my family?  I keep wondering what is wrong with me that this person defriended me?

But, then I must stop spinning out of control because things like this can make me crazy.

Wait.  Be quiet.  Listen.

It's not about me.  I have no control over someone else's behavior.

I strongly believe in leading up to this day there have been affirmations that have come from a host of friends.  Humor me while I remind myself there are people who still care and I need not get too bent.

The other day my precious BFF from high school wrote the latter after another high school classmate posted the following:

Young Lady. You are a pistol. Of all the people our age, you set the bar. Been following you since I got on Facebook and cudos to u. Always positive, Great wife, mom, teacher, motivator, fitness freak, Christian, community involvement, and still looking not a day over 30. I've been told I motivate people, Well Lovely Soul, you motivate me. Keep up the good work. Dave

Okay, as Kimmies orignal BFF I have to comment here. She knows how much I love her and always will and would probably be surprised if I did not comment. I have to be honest, some of her posts motivate me, all make me so proud of her and some make me feel like a slug. She is by far the eternal optomist never afraid to speak her mind no matter who she angers (usually having no idea she angered anyone making it all the more fun). I love all of this about her, I also love that she appreciates my "Mom Day" posts and I know she has days just like them just refuses to make them public. The other day I was erasing the word "lesbian" off my daughter's bedroom door with a Mr. Clean Magic eraser (put there lovingly by her little brother who should not even know what the meaning of the word is yet) and thought to myself "where did I go wrong" only to realize I go wrong a little every day but the fact that I have kept them alive this long is in itself an accomplishment in my book. We had so much fun laughing at the reunion over Kim's "perfect posts" and she cracked up at how some people had "defriended" her for posting so positively all the time, she laughed so hard and could not understand that concept. I think her most memorable post to me was one where she said she had run like 10 miles, picked up groceries on her bike all while Mike conducted a prayer vigil with the kids on the beach. I literally thought I might vomit but them I remembered this is Kimmie, she does not realize how inadequate she just made the rest of us feel, she just really wants everyone to know what a great day she was having and how happy she was, that was all I needed to know. I love you my sweet Kimmie and will never "defreind" you over your enless supply of positive posts, I will laugh and maybe shoot you a snide comment but you know it will be done in love!

Love this Girl!!

Then this post came in from a dear friend who knows my heart too.

 I really miss you and you were in two of my dreams the other night! In one we were working out together (running and tossing a med ball) and the other one I ran into you as you were rushing off to Disneyland. It's been almost a year since I've seen you and I'm thinking a visit needs to happen in the next few months! I'm really glad we're friends!

Love this Girlie!

Because we're weirdos! And I dreamed this.  And we were trying to make another friend laugh. 
Precious Girlies!
And we're weirdos too!  But it's fun!
Another friend sent a text saying he will friend me more since I'm down one.

This guy is Great!

From my friend who is probably the most differing politically of all friends, whom I care about deeply she mentioned me once in a "Table of 8" email.  She wrote, "kimberly--for loving me unconditionally even though we are so different.  yet so NOT different.  and for being with me in disneyland while i had  detached retina...something neither of us knew at the time."

Love her and she loves me even though we're so different!
And then there's this precious who had to move all the way from the Pacific Northwest so we could become great friends.  My hub jokes that we moved to SoCal and hang out with people from the Pacific Northwest.

And this sweetie!  We've been through a lot of thick and thin together.  I'll stick by her through it all!

Another precious PNW/SoCal girlie!  

So anyway, looking at these pics has lightened my heart!  There are other pics I could have included as well.  There are many other dear friends and family member we are blessed with.  I will count you all as HUGE blessings!!  I'm so crazy about you and the joy you bring to life!  Thank you true friends!


OSUZIEQ1 said...

My life and spirit have improved in the few months that we have known each other. Today, not knowing all this had happened, Chris and I were talking about wonderfulnit is to be around people like you who are so positive. It's a have it...others may not appreciate it because of something going on in their life, not yours. Fight the good fight and be yourself

Kimberly said...

Thanks Suzie! You guys are AWESOME!