Trying to Find the Joy

No lies. This transition has been tougher than I ever imagined.  As my earlier post noted we've been through quite a lot and this week it has continued.  I'm documenting some of these events so one day when we look back we'll be able to see how far God has led us.  He is Faithful. He is Sovereign. He has a Plan.

But, I forget.

To Want For Nothing

I've sat down to blog my thoughts many times in the last few weeks, but every time the words just don't come and the ones that did echoed my whiny complaints.  Our circumstances within the last year or so don't seem to make sense and I've asked the question, "Why?" too many times to count.

Not to bore you with the details of our life drama, know we've dealt with trials that encompass a cross-country move, loss of friends (due to move), sale of what we thought was our dream house, health issues, financial strain, insurance problems, auto issues, new school, renter issues, hotel living, court dates (to deal with non-paying renter), worries about our kids making friends, and as of Friday I learned my identity was stolen.

Covered By Prayer

In the last 24 hours a lot has happened.  Thankfully there are the faithful prayer warriors out there doing what they do and I'm witnessing the results of their intercession.

Yesterday, I met with the director of the homeschool program our kids were planning on attending.  After our brief meeting, I sensed some misgivings about attending.  First off, driving to the location required a commute on toll road that often has traffic delays.  Second, I sensed an air of conflict with the director. Third, it was a new program lacking years of experience.

The first day of this school was supposed to be today, but I was really hesitating being part of this group.  Stress began to set in.  What to do with little or no time to make changes?

Never Let Me Go

We've packed up and headed east.  In making this job transfer we've left behind palm trees, beautiful beaches, the hustle and bustle of Orange County and countless friends.  It's hard.  My heart aches to be close to the rushing waves.  I've lived close to the Pacific for the last 25+ years.  I didn't realize how much I'd miss it or how claustrophobic I'd feel without it.

It's Not About the Money

The Bug.

I was so excited to have two parties interested in the little green bug, but I didn't realize how hard making a decision between the two was going to be.  Many people would suggest to go with the highest offer price, but I soon found that didn't sit well with me.

Both interested parties were teenage girls. Girl #1, was my first caller.  She is 18 years old and in the process of getting her driver's license.  She's heading off to college in the fall and is currently employed as a Disney Princess.  Girl #2 is also about 18.  She lost her previous car to an unexpected engine fire.  In the fire she lost her purse, iPhone and other personal belongings so dear to a teenage girl.  Her family does foster care.  You know how I love that!

God's Faithfulness in the Small Things of Life

This morning I'm reminded once again of God's amazing faithfulness and the love He has for each one of us.  He knows my inner fears and anxieties and provides in the most amazing of ways.

As we continue to prepare for  this upcoming move, we're trying to downsize our belongings.  I have a little green bug that I have LOVED for the last 10 years.  This little bugger has brought a smile to my face every time I look at her and is a reflection of my youth and fun-loving spirit.  But sadly, it's time for the little bugger, or Sweetpea as my mom calls her, to find a new home.  She needs a vivacious young gal who will love her, care for her and find Bug-owner joy driving her.

Playing, Building, Learning

Some may say my Papa (grandfather) was a junk collector.  If you knew him you know he would NEVER consider throwing away a piece of copper wire, an old two-by-four, a rusty nail, or an unusable toilet.  He embraced the unwanted and reigned as king over his junk castle.  To him, these were ALL treasures and would one day be used to create a kingdom to be admired.

Wishing for the Back Peddle in Life

It was 1986.  Southern Illinois across the river from St. Louis.  I packed up my royal blue '73 VW Super Beetle and followed my mom in her Dodge Caravan and my dad in his red '64 Volvo 544.

This looks exactly like my dad's car

Here's my bug...and my friends from high school.
Not sure what they're doing. I think they're breakdancing.

We were packed and heading west.

Truth be told, I'm a west coast girlie.  Born in Washington, raised mostly between Washington and California, but I spent three years in small-town mid-America where I graduated from high school and attended my first year of college.

In those three years, I became a mid-west girl.  I loved it SO MUCH!  I had amazing friends.  I had acclimated to the heat and humidity along with the miserable deathly cold winters.  I planned on growing old in Southern Illinois, sitting around the table with my midwest girlies talking about small town life, and having my kids know about corn fields and lightning bugs, but my plans were abruptly changed.

In the summer of 1986 my dad received orders (military Colonel) to head west.  I was going back to the familiarity of the Pacific Northwest, but my heart wanted to stay in the midwest.

Much to my despair and objection, we packed up and headed west across the U.S.

My heart was being ripped out.  I think it somehow broke.  The grief set in.

I loved the life in the midwest.

Following our departure, sadly, I entered the worst years of my life.  I won't go into how bad they were.  Just know....They sucked!

Then in 1988, life began improving.  I transferred to a great college, met the love of my life, and the rest is history, or so they say.

Fast forward 20+ years.

We're living the BEST LIFE ever!  To be honest, I think we live in paradise.  The last three years have gone by in a blink and they have brought me countless moments of joy.  Life in the O.C. has been completely dreamy.

Never in a million years did I think we'd ever live anywhere but the west coast.  I find comfort knowing the ocean is close.  I love seeing the water.  The sunshine and moderate climate are appealing.  I consider myself a coastal girl.

But wait...

Transfer???

To where???

The Midwest???

Illinois??

Again???

I have long since let go of the midwest girl I once was.

I'm trying to wrap my head and heart around this one.

I'm trying to remind myself I have precious friends in the Land of Lincoln.  There are adventures to be had, opportunities to embrace!

But really, it's just my heart that is breaking.

The other night we went to a movie with some friends of my oldest son and one of the dads.

At the end of the movie, the friend's dad, a scruffy teddy-bear-of-a-guy and former undercover police officer hugged me and said, "Come back to California.  Come back to California."

I'd really like to.

Three years ago, when I moved back to California after years away, I got off the plane, took a deep breath, and thought, "I'm back!"  It felt good.  I feel like this is a land I belong in.

I hope there is good in store for us although right now it's tough to think of life somewhere else.

I'd really like to back peddle and somehow find a way to stay in Orange County.

Nothing's coming.

Pray for us as we enter this new chapter in our lives.

Prayer for our kids and my hub would be appreciated.  I grew up doing this...it's tough stuff.  Moving, finding a home, friends, church, school opportunities, sports programs, etc.  It can be overwhelming and we're feeling it now.

T-minus not so many days...

And counting.

Mini Healthy Hash Quiche For Kids

This week the contents of our fridge consisted of leftover frozen pie crust, Trader Joe's bacon ends and pieces,  kale, and A LOT of eggs.  What's a mom to do with these ingredients and lunch soon approaching?  Make mini quiches for the kids and a few paleo-ish quiche cups for a healthy lunch option for mom.

Make Way for The Ducklings!

Finding the extraordinary amidst the ordinary.

Today was an ordinary day.  I dropped the kids off at Junior Guards, then headed to have the oil changed in the car.  Finished up at the auto shop and then headed for home.

On the way home the lane of traffic I was in came to a sudden halt.  I tried switching lanes, and then also promptly stopped.

Crossing the street was a proud momma duck with her precious 9 ducklings.  They looked so small and helpless clustered close behind their momma.  They were headed to the local park.

Grandma Telling Stories of the Past

My Papa used to tell SO MANY stories of growing up in South Dakota, traveling out west, and settling in Seattle. In addition he had oodles of zany escapades recounting our crazy family history.  When he was around I thought I'd NEVER forget these nuggets of history, but now...they're hard to recall unless I'm with family and we jog each other's memories.  Oh how I wish I would have captured them!

Recently I went out to lunch with my Grandma, kids and cousin.  My Grandma began telling a story about settling in the Rainier Valley of Seattle.  I quickly changed the camera mode to record and tried to capture a bit.  I wish I would have gotten more, but it's inspired me to try in the future.

Here's the little tidbit I caught.  It's only about two minutes, but so rich in memory-making.

Radiator Springs Racers Video

We had the opportunity to experience Cars Land at California Adventure this week. Disney offered Annual Passholders one hour special event early entrance before the park opened to the general public. It was GREAT!  Having this hour before the masses allowed us to take in the new land, photograph it and go on a couple rides.

If you're going to California Adventure this summer, and you would like to go on Radiator Springs Racers, I would highly recommend getting there at opening, rushing to the Fast Pass line or go on as a Single Rider.  Otherwise, you're looking at a 3-4 hour wait.  Who wants to spend a good portion of the day in line?

When we got in line with our Fast Passes the wait time was 210 minutes for Stand-by.  By the time we got off the ride, Stand-by wait time was 240 minutes!!  We don't even know how bad it got as the day went on.  With our Fast Passes, our wait time was about 5-10 minutes.  We rode alongside two gals who did the Single Rider line.  They waited 45 minutes.  Not too bad.

Here's the ride from our vantage point:

I will post more photos from our day.  What a special day it was!

Perfect Words, Perfect Timing

This week was All-Star selection in our local little league.  It's met with enthusiasm and anticipation as boys from ages 9-13ish await to find out if they've "made the cut."  It's also a stressful time of anticipation for parents too.  Do we prepare our kids for the excitement or the big letdown?

Sports, politics and the politics of kids' sports stir up a mixed bag of emotions.  On one hand, I know in every league, if people are involved there will be amazing dedicated volunteers, kids striving for the best they can be and parents hoping their child will shine in America's Best-Loved sport.  On the other hand, with people involved and human flaws, life happens and the outcomes are not always fair...but that's life.  It's not fair.  And that's okay.

Kale Salad with Yam Noodles

I've heard so many people tell me they don't like kale.  Sadly, I hear it most often in our own house.  I don't get it.  Taste wise, kale is GREAT!  It's crunchy, lends great color to a salad, but the best thing about kale is its nutritional value!  I've heard it's the most nutritionally dense vegetable!  According to Livestrong.com

Dark green leafy vegetables are rich in iron, dietary fiber, calcium, vitamins B, E and K, protein, carotenoids and other antioxidants.

You really can't go wrong eating kale.

More Than a Sandwich...Treat Dad to a MANWICH

My mom sent me a forwarded email this morning titled MANWICH.  The name alone peaked interest so I checked it out.  What followed were photos of a SERIOUS sandwich that the likes of Guy Fieri would drool over.  I decided I would give it a try as we're trying to show added appreciation this week for my sweetheart and Dad to our kiddos.  How could we go wrong with sourdough bread, steak, bacon, Swiss cheese, mushrooms, onion and BBQ sauce?

My Brother Visits

The saying that time flies when you're having fun is so true.  I can't believe we've lived in southern California for almost three years!  In these three years we've had some friends and family visit, but in May we had some extra special visitors.  I think we had my mother-in-law, my Grandma and most recently my brother, sister-in-law and niece came for a one week visit.  As expected, the seven days FLEW by!

A Happy Day to Remember

Today is my birthday.  It's my half-way mark to 90 and my half-way mark to 50.  It's also Memorial Day.

As a kid I hated that my birthday always fell on or around Memorial Day.  Friends left on weekend get-aways, camping trips or picnics making birthday parties difficult to plan.  I grew up thinking it was a pretty sad and lonely time to have a birthday.

It Could Be Worse...I Could Be A Tribute

Remember Job?  We're having a Job kind of week.  If you're not familiar with this book named after a faithful man of God, Protestantism Suite 101 describes it as, 

"The biblical book of Job that gives an account of Job's sufferings and his trust in God has great quotes about the immensity of God's love, power and greatness.

The story of Job's life in the Bible comes up as the best example of extreme sufferings. From the moment Satan tests Job to the time God restores Job's fortunes, many great quotes and sayings can be found that exemplify God's divine power.

Job is the ideal good man, husband and father. Satan challenged this and said to God that Job is a complete believer because he is prosperous. God allowed Satan to test Job through a series of immense hardships, practically stripping him off all his possessions and loved ones; he also suffered a disease.

Job was in conversation with some friends, with mixed emotions as they try and help him out. In the end, Satan was unsuccessful as Job's trust and respect in God remained steadfast."

Where Are They Now? Another Teaching Year Comes to a Close

Teaching.  Last week two of my teaching commitments came to a close.  As I was packing up my class supplies I began to reflect upon the year. I get so sentimental, so easily.  I realized this year how much I love teaching, not just teaching my kids, but others.  I really do love it!  Perhaps this is why I'm so passionate about homeschooling.  I love learning and presenting material in a way that hopefully appeals to students.

Reaching the end of yet another year has given me cause to reflect on my brief experience in the public school arena.  The first kids I taught are now in their 30's!!  How can that be!  I wonder what became of them?  What happened to those little 4th graders?  Also, when I look at the precious gifts given to me by dear Ukranian students and their families, I wonder if they made it in their new found country, America.  What happened to Yuri, Alexei, Nazar, Ludmila, and so many more?  Did they embrace the freedom they were seeking?  Did the kids who struggled in 4th grade, make it through and find a love for learning?  I often wonder where they are now.  Teachers spend a year with kids, pour into them, and then the kids have to move on.  Next grade, next teacher, next year.

Little Nazar, Travis, Olga, Travis, Antonio...1992

Paleo Banana Pancakes...YUM!

I've been trying to perfect the paleo pancake for a bit now.  I totally miss eating pancakes!  They're my FAVORITE breakfast item.  This may scare some people, but when I was in high school I would eat a stack of 6 large buttermilk pancakes along with 4 eggs many mornings.  And even with all that food, I'd be hungry by 10:00 am and struggle to make it to lunch.  I was the one with the growling stomach in class. SAD!  I used to be so embarrassed and am so glad my kids don't have to experience this.